DISCLAIMER: This is breaking down MY PERSONAL BELIEFS. This is not me attempting to ‘convert’ anyone (I’m actually against that). I’m merely posting this for those that might be curious and want a look into how other people approach spirituality.
First thing’s first, an omnist does not mean “optimist” despite the words sounding so similar. Though I do consider myself an optimist in general, for the world anyway. For individual goals, though, sometimes I can be a downer. But that’s not what this article is about. Today I’ll be ripping apart my mind and delving into my belief system. Trust me, it’s strange. I don’t think I’ve met anyone with an identical mindset because I kind of just…built my own religion, in a way. Ready for a cliche? Alright then–I went with what I felt was right in my heart. Yeah yeah, go ahead and laugh. But let’s get into why I find myself so utterly strange, shall we?
A while ago I came to a revelation. I’m highly polytheistic, meaning I believe in all deities. I was curious as to what that meant, and a short google search told me. Omnism, according to Wikipedia, is the belief in all religions simultaneously. How is that possible, though, with some believing in either only one singular god, or some not believing in any at all? Well, I see the world in an odd way. First, I think that people’s thoughts influence what happens to them in the afterlife, to a point, however.
It seems morality is a natural part of a social species. That is, most of us have empathy due to the fact that we need to work together. And now, funnily enough, humans are the dominant species on the planet, for better or for worse. Social species generally are more intelligent–look at wolves, corvids, lions, dolphins, all of them are highly successful predators, and humans are no different. Working together and having empathy for each other as a species only helps us, and while there’s cons to it, the pros far outweigh the cons. What’s the point in me saying this? Well, I strongly believe in karma. That means my ‘what you think will happen probably will’ won’t apply if you’re an asshole. Karma will sink its claws into you and leave you a bloody husk at some point.
Therefore, I believe that if you’re generally a good person (which is never black and white, I get that), you’ll be rewarded with a great rebirth, afterlife, or what have you. Contrarily, you’re going to meet your end in a horrible fashion if you’re evil, in some way, shape, or form. Our species has evolved in a beautiful fashion, and I believe that there’s a reason for it. This of course could be due to me being a strong empath, but hey, we deal with what we get.
I don’t subscribe to the notion of ‘sin’. Things we enjoy in life, as long as we don’t go overboard or harm others, shouldn’t be scorned, for the gods’ sakes. That’s just how I see it, but I shake my head at how much some try to get people to change completely harmless activities by others by trying to shove their beliefs into their faces. If someone is doing no harm with an activity, leave them alone.
Now then, onto the subject of the gods. Oh boy, this is going to be…interesting. So I default to ‘pagan’ when talking to people about my beliefs, but that’s pretty much a lie. I don’t think I count as a real pagan, because I don’t worship the gods I choose in the same way as others, nor do I see them in the same light. The gods, to me, are ancestors of guidance, of whom can provide miracles or pushes in the right direction every so often. Er, I suppose I could say the gods I look up to ‘chose’ me. I sound like a lunatic when I say that, but trust me, I don’t let it affect my life at all. I just consider it in the back of my mind sometimes.
Anyway, I see the gods as having minds and emotion just like me. They’re not ‘all mighty’. They make mistakes too, and for some reason have ascended to a ‘higher power’ status to aid (or harm) the world. Also, the stories told about them are just that–stories. They might not be accurate, or they might be. I don’t focus on their history, just who they are to me personally. I know, this all sounds very strange. Let me give you an example of my er, ‘roster’ of ‘worshiped’ deities.
There’s some gods I choose to throw my hat to, per say. Odin, the father, who probably facepalms at my antics on a regular basis but wants me to succeed is the first. He reminds me of my dad, and a little fragment of him might indeed be within my dad or something. I don’t know. But I do feel he wants to see me grow as a powerful woman in my life and theoretically be a warrior.
Next on my list is a deity that kind of has no name, but I call her ‘Lacey’ because that’s what I heard in my head once. It just stuck. She’s a sassy, strong woman and wants me to embrace my sexuality. She doesn’t want me to be embarrassed about it, and I think she cried for me when I had such a strong fear of sex (this is something I got over with years of therapy!). She’s proud that I’ve gotten over that obstacle and continues to encourage my enjoyment of sex (safe sex of course.)
Hades yelled at me for not including him in this post, and I highly respect him. No idea why he slipped my mind, but I’m adding him in as a misunderstood god that generally has a caring heart, especially for Persephone. My perception is that the stories got it wrong; they chose to enter that relationship. He didn’t force it. Anyway, he’s an important part of maintaining the ‘death’ part of the life cycle.
Finally, there’s Gaia. She’s been with me my entire life, I think. My love of biology and animals pleases her, and I want to somehow work on helping the planet when I have the means to. She cries with me at adorable animal videos, most likely. Yes, that sounds silly, but hey I might as well toss in something to make it seem more… down to earth. People put the gods on a pedestal, but that’s not how I see them by any means.
I think Aphrodite is in there too, now that I think about it. A fragment of her would be in my mom. A beautiful woman that embraces it of course, and is generally kind. I don’t think about her much, but all things considered, I think mentioning her here is right.
Alright, so how do I ‘worship them’ exactly? I kind of just send them thoughts of ‘thanks’ in my mind and give them a smile. That’s about it. I don’t do any sort of ritualistic things. I did send out prayers once, but I’m pretty sure the response was something along the lines of: “Woman the fuck up and face your problems like you always have, young lady!” I don’t rely on the gods, nor do I fear them. To me, they are guardians that want to see me succeed in life, nothing more. The ones I worship, anyway.
I don’t have a source on this next statement, but I’ve been told that in some ways, I’m also a Satanist. There’s one aspect of that belief system that I embrace. “You are your own god”. Basically, I believe that all creators (artists, writers, video games, movies, the list goes on and on) are truly making worlds that exist somewhere. The multiverse is ever expanding, and every thought and creation adds to it. Yes, this includes horrifying hellscapes as well that generally should be avoided.
If you think about it, that means that if you create a world or character, they also have imagination and capability to create things as well, which in turn adds even more to the multiverse. Crazy to think about, huh? Could we be a creation in a similar fashion? That would line up a bit with those that are monotheistic.
I try not to rip into my brain at that one too much, because the amount of ideas and creations is therefore infinite. But yes, I do believe in an ever-expanding multiverse. Do I think we can ever access or talk to these creations, or interact with the worlds? Well, no, probably not. Let’s be realistic. Creating them, however, is good enough.
Finally, I believe anything is possible. That means magic, any creature, what have you! However, there’s a gigantic caveat to that. Whatever mystery exists in the world will likely never interact with people living lives on our planet or what have you. Our mundane lives will continue regardless of what does exist, but science can still show us a glimpse of the amazing wide world.
As for souls, I believe that every living creature has one. There is a balance of life and death constantly. I don’t walk on my tiptoes to avoid hurting everything, because to me that would be ridiculous. The predator and prey relationship is beautiful, and the life cycle is constantly whirling. That’s why my first tattoo is an Ouroboros.
I aspire to be a scientist. What I’ve said here will never get in the way of objective, hard, and cold science. Anything might be possible, yes, but the only thing we can lean upon are facts. I firmly believe that the scientific method is highly important for any major decisions that could effect our lives. My belief system is tucked away in the back of my mind most of the time. When it comes to science, it should always be.
As a scientist, I’m an atheist and believe only what I can observe. But as a person, separated from things that won’t hurt other people or effect society in general aside from storytelling, I am quite spiritual in my own little way.
So… yeah! Now you probably think I’m bonkers, off the wall, crazy. But hey, we all have our little oddities about us. Hopefully I’m not judged for posting this little piece of myself. I would never want someone to think I’m ‘preaching’. You do you as long as you’re not hurting others (without consent). As for me? I’ll do the same!
Des M. Astor 